It was a treasured seamlessly perfect, poignant day. A day when two ladies who had experienced and sadly completed the same ‘journey in life’ came together after five years of correspondence to meet at a little country station in Stamford, Lincolnshire, England. The oh so brave Susan wife of the late Dan Patterson from Colorado, came by rail from London with no working cell phone( having been informed it would work in the UK) and no means of contacting me should she become lost or miss her rail connections but thank goodness arriving safely at this small country station.
I had planned my journey carefully to make sure I was there at the station to meet Susan, no easy feat as living in a rural location and driving across country, it is often difficult to plan journey times precisely, as often you are caught behind a tractor slowing your journey to a snails pace and the weather conditions of late have brought some flooding to country locations. Still I was there in good time and asked the Station Master could I cross the little bridge and wait for my dear American friend whom I had never met before or even seen her face in a photo, but so wanted to be there to greet her on the platform as her train arrived from London. He was keen to oblige and smiled warmly at the lady wrapped up well against the chilling wind of this bright blue very exciting day, that “simply must be” on the platform to meet her American friend – he smiled the tired smile of some men when confronted with forceful requests – lucky I live in a country location – can you imagine getting on the platform at Charing Cross without a platform ticket!
I settled in the waiting room checking the neon overhead timetable every few moments excited but concerned that I would managed to find my far travelled friend. The train draw into the station perfectly on time ( thank you British Rail for not letting me down) and I held my breath as I searched the carriages for a lady similar age to me for that was all I knew ( you don’t really discuss hair colour when you are talking of grief do you?) and there, smiling the biggest smile was this supremely beautiful expectant face peering and waving out of the compartment window. Susan stepped onto the platform and straight into my arms – we hugged and hugged and smiled, laughed and cried all at once!   We kept looking into each others faces and it was as if we had known each other for a lifetime!
I had wondered what we could do for the day that would make it a little different -for a short day – for a dear friend from the ‘other side of the pond’ and so I settled on a visit to the beautiful majestic Elizabethan house of “Burghley” that was just a short drive away. We needed a good setting for this memorable day, we also needed plenty of good coffee and a fine luncheon. So having left my car in the station car-park so wanting to focus my attention entirely on this lovely lady I arranged a taxi to and from this historic inspiring grand home of William Cecil the first Lord Burghley (1520-1598) and still the home of the Cecil family. I asked the taxi driver to please make a detour around the very attractive town of Stamford so my visitor may see the medieval core of 17th century stone buildings and some much older timber framed ones. He was happy to oblige of course seeming proud of this little town.
It was a chilly blowy day with a lazy bitter wind but blue skies prevailed across our green land and peaceful pastures. We  spent time admiring the grounds and the beautiful façade  of this great house with the gentle roaming deer and wonderful views of proud noble trees and even though in bleak winter the sun shone for us and the pastures held their green.
And so it goes that two woman that only found each other through great sadness and just because a boyhood friend of Dan Patterson’s who was saddened beyond belief with the thought that he was to lose his greatest companion, trolled the internet for understanding of the wretched disease of Multiple Myeloma. This rare illness that had befallen both our men and Dan’s kind friend who happened across my little blog of love poems that had insisted that Susan read of the trials and tribulations of another  woman on the other side of the world, just like her, going through exactly the same sadness as her and her beloved Dan. Susan read my simple poems, came back again and again and the connection  was made. Every so often over the years I would receive a comment from Susan and then the emails began and the bond was made. Just two woman from other sides of the world, coming together in their grief.
And so with much joy, many tears, and many many words, we had our delicious coffees together and a splendid luncheon in the pretty Orangery Restaurant at Burghley. Not moving from the restaurant for several hours – five in fact! So many private words were spoken, so many tears were shed. Such a lovely, beautiful lady cut down with this heart wrenching grief, having just lost her beloved Dan only five months before but with such utter bravery and desire to meet the friend who had tried to help and understood only too well the dreadful grief she was feeling now. It was like I had known Susan all my life, experienced all of her pain and understood everything about the fight to try and help her husband to live, the time of profound caring and her complete love for this good man.  We talked and talked a mirrored image, back and forth in these beautiful surroundings, filling the hours completely. And so dear readers, yes it was just as it should have been, the sharing of grief, the understanding between two woman  of all we had been through and just as we knew it would be  our friendship was sealed…
Dear Susie and Susan
I am so glad you have each other. I just knew you’d feel like you’ve know each other a lifetime.
Love Lorna x x
What super photos to complement your memories of a wonderful day………I am so glad it went well and that there were no transport problems to cause hiccups !
See, intentions work… I was knowing of your ability to connect easily and I am so grateful it happened that way!
Oh yes Lorna – I remember when you met dear Paula – it must have been just the same – it seems you learn so much about a person through writing alone. All very best wishes to you and Mike.
Yes Sian – when you wish for things to be just right, often something ‘pops-up’ to spoil the best plans and you know only too well here in the UK it is often the weather, especially of late. I am glad you liked the photos – it has been a little struggle to get them just right on my blog at the moment, as having only just changed to Windows 8 I am still learning all the finer points – but I hope to improve. Love to you xx
You are so right Sandy – place your faith in a higher being and go for it – thank you for your good intentions that this should be a special day for it certainly was! Love to you x
Wonderful… I’m proud of both of you!
Thank you Jo for taking the time to leave your comment here for “Joy Laugher and Tears” – it means a lot x
dear susie,
how overflowing your heart must still be with the miracle of susan’s visit. the photo of the two of you, your sweet faces beaming with love and gratitude says it all. at last… “Joy, Laughter, and Tears” – come to life.
love, xoxo,
karen, TC
Yes Karen Even these few days later – I am still feeling amazed and delighted that we managed to achieved this meeting, because when you are ‘talking’ to someone over the years – via the internet – that you have never met, you are of course, only speaking to their heart!
To actually meet and so like that person and really feel they are a ‘sister in sadness’ but still manage to laugh and smile together – it is an amazing and rare connection. My love to you and thank you for taking the time to comment here. x
How wonderful 🙂
You both are blessed!
Beautiful story about two faraway friends meeting.
Loved it
Margie
Thank you so much dear Margie for your kind comment. I hope you are well – I shall be over at yours to read some of your lovely work shortly. Have a wonderful 2013 xoxo
Dearest Susie, I couldn’t control my tears of joy and for your unthinkable grief you and Susan share. This is a great love story of emotions and feelings only two who have shared similar pain can relate to. I could vividly envision your pleading with the conductor, your encounter with Susan for the first time and what a brilliant idea to take a taxi instead so you could also enjoy the scenic ride to the restaurant and focus on your friend. Very smart! It’s wonderful that you are sharing this with all of us. We NEED to know how you’re doing and what you’re doing to help yourself heal and reach out to others in the process. You’re one very amazing and beautiful soul. God Bless you always. xoxoxo
Thank you so much dear Lora for your tender words left in this kind comment here.
I am glad you enjoyed the sharing of this true story of two woman who have suffered in the same way. For it is all I hope for, that my words may help just one other person to understand that the sharing of grief is sometimes helpful for some of us. We often feel after bereavement that there is just no place to take our grief – no person to share this pain with and no one to listen to our worries. Many have no one else close by or perhaps friends and family that are too busy with their own lives to continue to support them and so may choose to read here and in so doing may gain some peace. If there is anyone that wishes to discuss privately with me their own sadness or requires a little support, they can reach me at susiehemingway@gmail.com Blessings dear Lora xoxo
What a way to start the day! Thank you for that story, Susie, it was great to read. It seems only a short time ago that I was led here, much like Dan’s friend who found you by chance. I can’t believe that more than two years have passed. Yours continues to be a remarkable story, and thank you for sharing. All best to you and yours, and I’m glad you were able to connect from another person from “over here.”
Glad you liked this Michael – it was a memorable day with dear Susan from the other side of the’ big pond’. A long way between us but not a world of difference when we sat together. Both having been through the same thing, we understood each other so well with matters of the heart. It was a delight to meet her at last. How quickly these years have passed and yet it seems an eternity since I have heard that lovely voice of that man of mine. Sending all good wishes to you too Michael – stay safe and thank you.
Wow, a beautiful, powerful, emotional meeting! I feel so blessed, to follow along….Susan and Dan came into my life about 21/2 years ago and now I have “met” you through this thing we call “networking”. Not only is this story amazing, but the bond created thru tragic circumstances is testimant to your incredible human spirit. I’m feeling pretty lucky amd honored to have connected on the “Susi” level…..Both of you create writing that blows me away…I’m excited to continue reading your words and want to thank you for writing and sharing and laughing and crying….with Susan’s all over the world!
Thank you.
Fondly, Susi Erwin
How kind that you have taken precious time to leave your very kind comment here Susi. Yes, it’s amazing this wonderful internet world, that we can all join in our sharing and understanding of grief, and in finding strength to support each other during troubled times. It is also rewarding to have the support of so many friends here. I am glad that you have connected with our words – it means so much. Ah and now there are three Susie’s… Thank you.