I’ve never made a fancy cake
a malt loaf is really me
I can make a lovely cuppa
so I can always have Assam tea.
I can rustle-up a chicken pie
with the shortest crust you’ll ever find
with a tasty bit of gravy too
but I never make tiramisu,
or even glorious meringues that rise
in heavenly peaks that reach the skies!
I’d rather have a drop of gin
and write a little ditty,
I’m getting on a bit you see
but I really don’t need your pity.
I truly like to dance and sing
with music playing in my ears
a duster in my hand,
like I was seventeen again
as I listen to rock-bands!
I like the music blaring out
put on my heels and gad about,
It gets the work done double quick,
then a drop of Gordon’s, does the trick.
Pies,Poetry and a pint of Gin
my life’s complete, I dream within
of Para-gliding in sunny climes
but to be quite honest I haven’t time.
I’m busy selecting the brightest hues
of brand new hair colours
and when I stand in queues,
I love to listen to the latest chat
of pretty girls who admire my hats!
I love to spray the testers too,
such fun to smell like a famous star
with Chanel and Gucci, I’ll go real far…
Never mind the ‘leccy bill, would
love a new lipstick, better than pills!
Ah! this ones, the one for me
scarlet red, smooth as can be
will make me feel like twenty three,
Pies, Poetry and a Pint of Gin
to dance down street, new life within.
I’ll spend the days reviewing years
I like to write and think a lot
not much one for knitting socks,
nor for mowing or removing weeds,
I think I’ll move overseas
and sit all day with skirt to knees!                                                                                                                                                                                                               In deck-chair on sand and feet in sea,
with wrinkled face and cigar for me.
I can dance all night in Latin clubs
with swarthy handsome younger coves,
then come home at dawn for a cup of tea,
perhaps I can learn to water ski?
But really all I need is
Pies, Poetry and a Pint of Gin !
Copyright @ Susie Hemingway 2009
That was so delightful that I smiled and giggled through all of it and then re-read it just because! How fun that must have been to pen that one. You must have been feeling very carefree and perhaps already experienced a glass of that gin?!! Now about that cigar…..hmmmm….does it mean the same type of cigar as in the U.S.? As we both know, sometimes your words mean something else here. Enjoyed this thoroughly.
This one really made Stu and I chuckle this morning! A great poem – Well done.xx Lots of Love Ellie and Stu.xx
Excellent – like this one a lot!
Thank you so much for your comments on my little attempt at being ‘funny’ It made Jen laugh this morning Ellie.
The title came from something Matt said when he came up for my ‘reading’ at the Pie and Ploughmans Bunch earlier this year.It made me laugh and I thought then what a great title for a poem!
Lora: I reeeeally, really! don’t drink that much, yes I admit to having always chosen a G&T from rather a young age, as my social drink of choice but seldom have more than one, I do love a glass or two of good red wine with my dinner but never alone. I was enjoying a nice cup of tea when I wrote this. I do admit in the old days, to having the occasional cigar ( yes the nice cuban ones) when living in the Middle East but I never smoke now, just now and then, an Apple and Mint ‘Shisha'( Hookah Pipe) with Jo, when he comes up. I can even make a passable Tiramisu and a good Pavlova but knew this would make a giggle for the family, as they know I much prefer to write or dance and yes the rest is me. My Sister Jen, has promise that when it’s ‘my turn’ she will put a luscious Revlon lippy in with me! It was great fun Lora to write this.
You to a “T”. Fun , music and laughter.
Awesome .. My fav by a long way!! So funny me and laura giggled like mad children in the kitchen!! More more more like this!! X x x Jo
I like this one very much, it is you, such funny words and this made me laugh a very lot. Yes you are this lady there is no doubting this.
I found your ditty when i was looking for something to read while having early dinner and i loved it!
A stranger who wants to do all that you are doing 🙂